Let's talk about sex, passion, & enlightenment.

This is Part 2 of our best relationship advice series where Tatiana and I answer your questions.

In Part 1, we talked about how to keep things exciting in a long-term relationship, how to find your perfect soulmate, and how to deal with arguments.

In this blog, we dive into some juicier topics and we don't hold back with our answers.

If you have the desire to rekindle the passion and intimacy in your relationship, read this!

Watch the video below:

(Click here to watch on YouTube)

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Do you want a sneak peek of the day that Tatiana and I said, “I do” to one another? CLICK HERE to watch our wedding video! 

This page contains affiliate links. If you purchase a product through one of them, I will receive a commission (at no additional cost to you). I only ever endorse products that I have personally used and benefitted from personally. Thank you for your support!

To love and be loved in return is the ultimate gift.

The test of a life well-lived has nothing to do with money and everything to do with love. One of the sole purposes of a relationship is to amplify human emotion. Whenever I've achieved big successes in my life or business, guess who I've wanted to share it with?

Tatiana!

She is the love of my life. When great things happen I want to share them with her. Being in an intimate relationship is one of the most powerful ways to grow spiritually. The experiences that Tatiana and I have shared are greater than anything else we've achieved in our lives, combined.

By no means do we have a perfect relationship. However, we've learned a lot of relationship principles over the last 7 years that we've been together. These principles have helped us create a healthy and long-lasting relationship, based on love, passion, and intimacy.

Whether you're already in a committed relationship or are still looking for love, the relationship advice that we share with you today will add value to your life. Let's dive in!

How do you improve your sex life after being together for 7 years?

First, it's important to understand the dynamics of masculine and feminine energy. What creates passion and spark in a relationship is sexual polarity. Both men and women can have masculine and feminine energy. However, each of us has a certain nature. My nature is more masculine, whereas other men's nature is more feminine.

Knowing what nature you connect with most is very important.

If you want to have passion and attraction in a relationship you need to create polarity. Opposing masculine and feminine energies, when they are truly embraced in a relationship, are what create that “spark” of sexual energy.

When it comes to our sex life, we use these energies when it's appropriate. In business, I know that I need to bring out my masculine energy. However, when it comes to our relationship, we want to make sure that we have polarity.

Tatiana's nature is to be in her feminine, so she likes to do specific things that allow her to connect with her feminine energy. When she's in her feminine, I'm drawn to her and I want to claim her. In turn, she has the desire to surrender and be claimed by me. If you're in a relationship that is missing intimacy and passion it is usually because there is depolarization.

In this day and age, a lot of women find it challenging to embrace their feminine energy. Why? Because masculine energy tends to be rewarded more in business. As an example, Tatiana is an entrepreneur who spends the majority of her day using her masculine energy.

After a long day, it can be hard for her to transition back into her feminine energy with me. This is when polarity suffers. To counteract this, Tatiana takes some solo time for herself after work. This allows her to make the transition from her masculine to her feminine energy. This may look like taking a hot shower to cleanse away the day, doing her makeup, or spending some time dancing.

It will look different for everyone.

There are certain things that you can do in your relationship that will help to elicit feminine or masculine energy in your partner. One simple practice that Tatiana and I like to engage in is eye gazing. We will sit facing each other with our hands on one another's hearts.

Sometimes we will match and mirror our breathing so that we experience synchronicity. When we do this, we can literally feel what one another is feeling. Eye gazing is a powerful practice for creating a presence with your partner and connecting with him/her on a deeper level.

When I'm looking at her I'm giving her my undivided attention. I want her to feel all of my love. In turn, she feels my presence and my energy through my gaze. The feminine is like a flower. When a woman feels a man's presence, she blossoms and dissolves into her feminine energy.

When it comes to having sex with your partner, it's important to understand that there is light and dark energy. Sometimes people will only allow themselves to bring out one type of energy. When this happens, there's a part of your and your relationship that doesn't get to be experienced.

Tatiana and I make it a priority to explore dark and light energy in the bedroom. You have to read your partner's body language and respond to what he or she is asking for sexually.

We highly recommend that you read the book Cupid's Poisoned Arrow: From Habit to Harmony in Sexual Relationships by Marnia Robinson. She studied all of the different philosophies and religions related to relationships. In her book, she shares a spiritual sexual practice called The Karezza Method.

This is a way of making love to your partner that is very slow and sensual.

When you make love with this practice, the goal isn't to have an orgasm or to ejaculate. Rather, the goal is to deepen the sexual and emotional connection with your partner through sensual touch.

Another great book is called The Multi-Orgasmic Man by Mantak Chia, which teaches you how to have orgasms without ejaculating by challenging the energy through your chakras. Tatiana and I go several months at a time without orgasming or ejaculating and we've noticed so many benefits in our relationship from doing so.

Do you get jealous if Tatiana makes more money than you, and vice versa? 

Absolutely not. We are on the same team. I want Tatiana to fulfill her potential and achieve whatever goals she desires. We don't have fear around that. I don't define my happiness, identity, or self-worth based on how much money she or I make.

If you want to learn more about Tatiana and the work that she does, I highly recommend that you subscribe to her YouTube channel and follow her on Instagram.

Over the last few years, we've done well financially to the point that we never have to work again. However, there was a time in both of our lives when becoming financially free was important. Unfortunately, that mentality made us feel that we never had enough money.

Lately, we've been working on giving up a lot of the attachment that we once had to money. Today, our mental and emotional health, spirituality, family, and relationship are our top priorities.

This is our best relationship advice on sex, passion & enlightenment.

Everyone wants and deserves to experience connection, passion, and intimacy with their partner. We hope our advice inspires you to reignite passion in your relationship or helps you to get clear on what qualities are important to you in a partner.

Do you want a sneak peek of the day that Tatiana and I said, “I do” to one another? CLICK HERE to watch our wedding video! 

I stopped having orgasms for 65 days. You might be thinking, “Why would you do such a thing? That's crazy!”

A few years ago, I would have had the same reaction. I didn't practice abstinence as a way of punishing myself.

Orgasms feel great. However, I had a bigger purpose in mind when I decided to embark on this 65-day orgasm-free journey.

Would you believe me if I told you that some of the best sex comes without orgasm? Research shows that overstimulation of the pleasure receptors can also desensitize the brain to pleasure or create a craving for more.

If you want to discover the life-changing benefits of abstaining from orgasms, keep reading!

Watch the video below:

(Click here to watch on YouTube)

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Do you want to discover how you can harness your sexual energy and attract more success into your life? CLICK HERE to join my Life Mastery Accelerator program!

This page contains affiliate links. If you purchase a product through one of them, I will receive a commission (at no additional cost to you). I only ever endorse products that I have personally used and benefitted from personally. Thank you for your support!

What is the purpose of having an orgasm?

I was originally inspired to abstain from orgasming after reading the book called, Cupid's Poison Arrow: From Habit to Harmony in Sexual Relationships by Marnia Robinson. This is one of the best relationship books I've ever read. In her book, Marnia shares what happens inside the brain when you orgasm.

An orgasm is the most pleasurable experience that a human being can have. However, it doesn't serve any utility unless you have the desire to produce a child. When you orgasm, you experience a momentary feeling of elation and a sense of relief, especially if you're stressed or anxious.

During an orgasm, a neurochemical storm is created inside the brain. Specifically, your brain releases a rush of dopamine. This is a highly addictive neurotransmitter that is responsible for feelings of pleasure and desire. An orgasm is similar to the feeling you would get if you consumed a drug, like cocaine or heroin. With every drug, will experience a high and a crash. The same thing happens when you have an orgasm.

When most men have an orgasm, immediately after they've ejaculated, they feel relaxed, drained, and tired. Women experience a similar thing, but sometimes the crash doesn't happen for a few days. If you've ever felt tired or lacking in motivation for no reason, it's highly likely that your dopamine levels are low.

A lot of people look for ways to boost up their dopamine.

They will do this by consuming pornography, eating junk food, binging on video games, gambling, or having sex. If you want to learn more about the effects of dopamine on the brain, I highly recommend you read the book, The Molecule of More: How a Single Chemical in Your Brain Drives Love, Sex, and Creativity―and Will Determine the Fate of the Human Race.

I used to have days where I didn't want to do anything. I felt lazy, tired, and depressed, but I didn't know why. Eventually, I concluded that the culprit was dopamine, which was the result of overstimulating my dopamine through sex or porn. Referring back to the book by Marnia Robinson, if you're in a relationship, it's easy to become desensitized to your partner.

Once the honeymoon phase is over, you become habituated to your partner. In her research, Marnia found that in the two weeks after a partner had orgasmed, he/she was more annoyed by their partner. A lot of couples start fighting, without even realizing that an orgasm is one factor that is contributing to their issues. This is why Marnia suggests abstaining from orgasm. If you're single, this means refraining from masturbating.

My partner and I practice The Karezza Method. This is a way of love-making without the outcome of having an orgasm. In fact, the main purpose is intimacy and connection. With a feather-like touch, the focus is on touching and caressing your partner, with slow stimulation. When you have sex in this way, it releases oxytocin. This is what allows you to feel more attracted to and connected with your partner.

A lot of sex in relationships is influenced by porn.

Unfortunately, this kind of sex can feel distant and disconnected. The end goal in the stimulation of genitals and the ‘success' of the love-making is based on whether or not someone ‘gets off'. When you overstimulate dopamine through orgasm or masturbation, you build up a tolerance for it, meaning that you end up needing more of it to experience any form of pleasure.

This is why I'm a big believer in doing a dopamine detox. When you abstain from orgasming or pornography, you reset your brain. In turn, you wake up and feel great for no reason! Since I've stopped having orgasms, my partner and I are more attracted to one another than ever before. My energy has improved, my brain is functioning better, and I just feel happier overall.

If you're a man, you may be wondering, “What do I do with all of the sexual tension that I feel from not orgasming?”

Some men encounter blue balls in their groin area. Tantra practices can really help to circulate sexual energy throughout your body, from your pelvic floor to your heart. Kegel exercises are also a great way to strengthen your pelvic floor muscles and create more control when you're making love to your partner. If you want to learn more about this read the book, The Multi-Orgasmic Man: Sexual Secrets Every Man Should Know by Douglas Arava and Mantak Chia. They've got some great content on how to use and control your sexual energy.

You may also be wondering, “Isn't it good to ejaculate once in a while?”

I've done some research and I found that this isn't necessarily true. Surprisingly, men can reabsorb semen. Also, men will usually have a wet dream if they are desiring a release. This will happen when they are sleeping.

I want to shift the conversation away from orgasming now and talk about pornography.

There are a lot of men (and women) who are struggling with porn addiction. Moreover, some men aren't even aware of the consequences of consuming pornography. When talking about this issue, I am going to focus on men. The reason being is that I am a man and have had past experiences struggling with porn. However, this does not mean that women don't struggle with pornography too.

Pornography trains your brain to be aroused through pixels on a screen. As a result, men tend to struggle to be attracted to a real woman because they are fixated on having sex, as seen in porn videos. Unfortunately, that's not real-life sex. Another negative consequence of watching porn is that men deal with erectile dysfunction. They are unable to be aroused by a woman in front of them. This can cause feelings of depression, isolation, and low self-esteem.

This is the result of overstimulation and training your brain to be attracted to something that isn't real.

There is a great book called Your Brain on Porn: Internet Pornography and the Emerging Science of Addiction by Gary Wilson. He dives deeper into the cognitive neuroscience behind Internet porn addiction and offers some great advice for those who want to stop using pornography.

The great news is that the brain is capable of changing! There is some amazing cutting-edge scientific research on brain neuroplasticity that is over-throwing outdated beliefs that the brain is immutable. The book The Brain That Changes Itself: Stories of Personal Triumph from the Frontiers of Brain Science by Dr. Norma Doidge highlights some of this research.

Pornography doesn't have to control your life for one day longer.

If you are someone who is struggling with porn addiction and are ready to seek help, there is a great community-based recovery platform for porn addiction that I recommend called, NoFap. 

There is also a free online video-based porn addiction recovery platform called, Fortify: Quit Porn For Good that has helped thousands of people get their lives back from porn addiction. Lastly, I also recommend the porn and masturbation addiction app called Brainbuddy, which helps to rewire your brain and create healthy, new synaptic pathways that free you from porn addiction.

Every area of my life changed when I stopped having orgasms for 65 days.

There are very few things in life that I've received so many benefits from and I wish I could go back and tell my younger self about. Abstaining from orgasming is one of them. I'm not saying that you should never have another orgasm for the rest of your life. Just try abstaining for 30-60 days and see how you feel.

If you're in a relationship and you've been having sex one way for a long time, why not trying something new? You can always go back to orgasming and then compare how you feel orgasming versus abstaining. Knowledge is power. You can do ANYTHING for 30-60 days if you put your mind to it.

If you are ready, I encourage you to give yourself the gift of a dopamine detox. It can change your entire life.

Do you want to discover how you can harness your sexual energy and attract more success into your life? CLICK HERE to join my Life Mastery Accelerator program!